Famous Quotes: Funny

What's funny about that is when I was writing Twilight just for myself and not thinking of it as a book, I was not thinking about publishing, and yet at the same time I was casting it in my head. Because when I read books, I see them very visually.
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My uncle Sammy was an angry man. He had printed on his tombstone: What are you looking at?
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A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.
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I did not have three thousand pairs of shoes, I had one thousand and sixty.
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How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
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I don't hate humanity and I'm not interested in people who do. Although, it's funny, actually, some of my favorite writers really do. Like Martin Amis. My dirty secret. 'London Fields' is one of my favorite books ever. And it's indefensible! But he's so funny... I forgive him everything.
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In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.
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When I tell people I'm a comedian they say, 'Oh, are you funny?' I say, 'No, it's not that kind of comedy.'
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'Lucky' is for laughs, and there's really nothing funny that I'm doing on 'Dexter.' I think more than anything, both comment on the fact that anybody is capable of anything. Just because they are the shy guy in the corner doesn't mean that they are a harmless little bunny.
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It's funny; I actually made poorer decisions when I sobered up then when I was screwed up.
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It's harder to be funny if you're handsome than if you're very normal-looking. It's just more relatable. You're the underdog. I mean it's funny to see people struggle, and you don't buy that Brad Pitt is struggling, you know that guy could be the most skill-less guy in the world, but if you look like that you will be fine for the rest of your life.
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I have funny bones. If there's ever any kind of tension, I'll always be the one to try and be funny to loosen things up.
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Funny is only something that others know about you - you can't be funny by yourself.
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This shirt is dry clean only. Which means... it's dirty.
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Funny things happen to you in movies for silly reasons.
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'Funny Games' was conceived as a provocation. My other films are different. If people feel my other films are, or respond to them as provocation, then that's quite different. 'Funny Games' is the only one of mine where my intention was to provoke the audience.
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Yes, I believe blue material is funny, but if that's all you've got, you're dead in the water. It's not good.
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When I was younger I wanted to be a big movie star who'd get to be funny on talk shows and then I wanted to retire and write science fiction.
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I have a very low level of recognition, which is fine by me.
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Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny - Did you ever try buying then without money?
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